Top tips to combat incontinence

Whether incontinence is a problem for you, or a worry for your parent, it is a very sensitive issue.  It can be difficult to talk about and there is unfortunately still a stigma associated with it.  This has stopped people speaking up and getting the help they need.

Incontinence is more common than you realise If your parent or relative has bladder or bowel incontinence, they will probably feel very embarrassed and anxious about it.  They may also feel depressed, like their body has let them down in some way. You may be feeling awkward too: unsure about how to discuss the problem or what to do for the best, whilst respecting their privacy.

It may help to know that if you do suffer from incontinence, you are not alone. In fact,  incontinence is an issue for several million people in the UK. NHS figures estimate that between 3 and 6 million people in the UK have some degree of urinary incontinence and around one in four adults has experienced bowel or bladder weakness .

The psychological effects of incontinence Even if the problem may seem minor to others, sufferers may worry a great deal about it. They may find incontinence starts to limit their everyday life and may be apprehensive about going out, in case they lose control or are unable to find a toilet in time. They may avoid staying overnight away from home, in case they have an accident in someone else’s bed.

Incontinence can make people feel isolated and withdrawn, when they should be enjoying life in the company of family and friends.  Sadly, the NHS estimates that 45% of people who are suffering with incontinence wait 5 years before asking for help. Mary (83) says, “I think for people my age, who are still mentally alert, incontinence is the biggest thing – more so than getting ill. You want to do things, go out to meals but you worry about losing your dignity or embarrassing yourself.

If you’re in a new place, with new people to meet, you don’t want to be going to the loo all the time and drawing attention to yourself. If you can’t walk very well, that makes it even more difficult. You can end up going out and hardly eating or drinking anything, to make sure you don’t have a problem. That’s not much fun. Or you might think it’s just not worth the worry, so you refuse the invitation, stay at home and miss out.”

Three quarters of people seeing incontinence nurses are also affected by depressive illnesses.  It’s important for older people that the stigma associated with incontinence is broken down, and sufferers get the treatment they need. Talking about incontinence with professional people who are sensitive and caring is a major step towards combating anxiety and embarrassment.  There’s plenty that can be done to help, and no need to struggle on alone. Sufferers can be reassured that with help and support, they will be able to enjoy a normal life again.

How to get help for incontinence If people can be encouraged to seek help, the good news is that there’s lots of support and treatment available. Rather than being seen as an inevitable aspect of ageing which needs to be endured, early treatment can cure or improve and manage incontinence very effectively.

The first step is to make an appointment with the GP who will offer advice and possibly medication. He or she may also refer your parent to an NHS Continence Advisor at one of 360 NHS Continence Clinics in the UK. These clinics deal with incontinence issues every day and the advisor will assess the problem and develop a treatment plan in a confidential, empathic way. They claim to improve the lives of between 75%-80% of incontinence sufferers significantly, without the need for surgery.

In fact, only 10%-15% of people will need surgery. Continence Clinics are usually based in hospitals and health centres and anyone who would rather bypass their GP can even phone them direct for an appointment. To find details of your local NHS continence clinic, call your local hospital, or the Bladder and Bowel Foundation (B&BF) confidential helpline on 0845 345 0165, or use the continence clinic directory on the B&BF website (you have to register to use this online facility).

Treatment for incontinence Treatment for incontinence will depend on each individual’s symptoms, but might include physiotherapy exercises to strengthen the pelvic floor muscles, medication, losing weight, stopping smoking or reducing caffeinated drinks. Sometimes, people with incontinence limit their intake of drinks to avoid needing the loo, which is not advisable as it can trigger other health problems, such as bladder infections or headaches.

Preparing in advance for going out with incontinence Everyday life will become much easier if you are able to talk about your older relative’s needs and help them be prepared for any eventuality. When you go out, you can research toilet facilities in advance and reassure them about access. When travelling, it’s helpful to wear dark clothes which are easy to manage and sit in an aisle seat, close to the toilet.

You can prepare a small clean-up bag containing wet wipes, clean clothes, plastic bags, deodorizing spray and hand sanitizer. This will help manage some of the anxiety associated with going out. There are also some excellent new products on the market, which can help with the practicalities of incontinence.  Wearing personal pads or pull up pants in the day time can avoid concerns about going out, either to friends’ houses or restaurants.

For night time and for staying overnight in new places, there are discreet mattress protectors now available on the market, specially designed for incontinence. Unlike the unpleasant sweaty, plastic sheets of old, which are uncomfortable and embarrassing, these new mattress protectors have a soft, breathable cotton or Tencel top cover, with a discreet, ‘rustle-free’ waterproof layer below. They are affordable, easy to machine wash and tumble dry. See Hippychick for more information.