The importance of friends to combat loneliness

As September 2015 is Oddfellows Friendship Month across the UK, we thought we’d look at the importance of friendship in combating loneliness in older people.Loneliness can have a devastating impact on the lives of older people both emotionally and in terms of their health. Nearly half (49%) of all people aged 75+ live alone so maintaining connections with family and friends is vital. Continuing to meet new people and to make new friends can also make a big difference.We can all help our older relatives and neighbours to combat loneliness and fortunately, there are a wide range of activities and organisations that can help.

Health risks of loneliness

The campaigning charity Friends of the Elderly says that more than five million older people in the UK are affected by loneliness, and more than one million say they are often lonely. This number is predicted to increase 40% by 2030, as the number of people aged 65+ continues to rise.

Age UK reports that loneliness can be as harmful for our health as smoking 15 cigarettes a day. In addition, extremely lonely people are twice as likely to develop Alzheimer’s as people with a low degree of loneliness.

Sadly, 5 million people say that television or pets are their main form of company. By contrast, people who participate in activities which promote health and independence are less likely to feel isolated and be happier with their community.

Make an effort to stay in touch

Modern families are often geographically dispersed, which means that older relatives may not receive visits quite as often as they’d like. In between these face-to-face visits we can all make more of an effort to stay in touch with regular phone calls, texts, a letter, or postcard.

If your older parent has a computer and can use the internet, then Skype chats can be a brilliant way to stay connected as you can see as well as hear each other. Facebook can also be a great way to keep up to date with the adventures of travelling grandchildren. You can read more in our article on ‘Caring from a distance ‘

Help your older parent get online

Around 6 million people over 50 are still offline in the UK., yet getting online offers tangible benefits to older people, particularly in providing an easy way to maintain social connections and support networks, plus access to a vast range of information. Mastering simple computer skills can help to bolster and developing self-confidence and social skills.

The myageingparent technology section has a huge amount of information and tips designed to help you help your older relatives become more comfortable with technology. Our article Digital inclusion for older people details the benefits of encouraging older parents to get online.

We have also teamed up with We Are Digital to offer older people lessons at just £40/hour in the comfort of your own home. See our article on The benefits of being online for details.

The importance of making new friends

For many people, major life events, such as bereavement, divorce and retirement, can be the beginning of a long struggle with loneliness and loss of self-esteem.

As we grow older, family members and lifelong friends may move away or die. If these relationships are not replaced with new friends, then loneliness and social isolation can begin to take a toll. Try to encourage your older relative to take up a new hobby or activity,.or to volunteer. Both are great ways to make new friends.

If romance is still of interest, then you might find our articles Help your older parent find love or  companionship and our Guide to dating and remarriage in later life useful.

Day centres and befriending

Many organisations operate day care centres in most towns and for a small fee, older people can be picked up and dropped back home after spending the day in a social environment. Day care centres offer a great way of reducing social isolation. Most offer a hot meal and a range of entertainment, outings and craft activities.

A sitting or befriending service can be really useful for older people, especially those without access to transport. Weekly visits offer companionship, someone to share a hobby or activities with, and a link with the outside world.

Here are a few websites that offer befriending services:

Friends of the Elderly

Royal Voluntary Service

Age UK

The Befriending Scheme

Sue Ryder

Alzheimer’s Society

And The Silver Line run a telephone befriending service.

Contact the Elderly tea parties

Contact the Elderly is a UK charity set up specifically to tackle loneliness and social isolation among older people. Volunteers organise monthly Sunday afternoon tea parties They organise monthly tea parties for small groups of people aged 75+ who live alone. The tea parties are a great way of meeting people and kindle new friendships. You can search the charity’s website to find out if there is a tea party near to where your older parent lives.

Oddfellows Friendship Month

Founded in 1810, Oddfellows is a not-for-profit friendly society, with 280,000 members and 146 branches nationwide. Its aim is to improve the quality of people’s lives through friendship, care and charity. Oddfellows Friendship Month is an annual campaign which sees volunteer members hosting hundreds of what they call Sociable TEA events across the UK throughout September. The idea is to bring communities together and highlight the importance of friendship.

If you think these events (often free), which include walks, tea dances and craft workshops, may appeal to your older parent or relative, then it’s easy to search for an event near to where they live on the Oddfellows website here.

More useful articles:

Digital inclusion for older people

Benefits of being online

Help your older parent find love or companionship

 

 

 

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